Run in but would rather run out!

Had a run-in with my team leader today, she presented me with a tray full of unfranked mail at midday knowing full well that my train leaves at seventeen minutes past the hour. I began to run each letter through the franking machine when it ran out of credit. With just ten minutes to spare I handed the task over to Mandy, our new very keen volunteer, who took the hefty tray of post with a smile. As I hotfooted it to the door my team leader halted me in my tracks with a tray of steaming drinks for the team and strict orders for me to frank the post. My protests fell on un-listening (and un-ladylike) ears. Old spaniel lobes kept me at the office til 35 minutes past the hour, slowly presenting me with letter after letter. I have made a note of this extra five minutes work in my new notepad I have titled 'Extra Work, No Thanks'. Why I had to miss my train when Mandy hovers by my table with her sweet perfume waiting for her next task beggars belief!

Can Wait

Louise stopped by this evening with a tupperware box filled to the brim with baked bananas in a wine sauce. Its a send off surprise she rustled up for Pierre. He finally embarks on his inter rail adventure tomorrow (he has already delayed it by a week to spend more time with my lovely daughter). She has decided to join Pierre on his exploration of European hostels and will be leaving next week. She wants me to go to Preston train station to see her off, I can't refuse despite the inevitable presence of my acid tongued Ex. I am practising patience and undertstanding in preparation. I am utterly dreading it.

Dessert Island Risk

It was Portland Hospital Radio's summer extravaganza over the weekend. Kazzy suggested we have a retro dessert raffle, which sounded totally outlandish but proved very popular. My daughter Louise baked jam roly poly, spotted dick (which she drenched in mint custard reminiscent of puddings from her school days) and a delicious lemon merengue pie. Kazzy attempted Baked Alaska aided by the hospital canteen's industrial microwave, it was a complete flop and I brought banana fritters, which unfortunately went mushy in my bag. Everyone got into the spirit and offered free samples of their desserts. I had mouthwatering summer pudding, sickly crepes suzette and I was teased by a lady who mastered a delicious hot vanilla souffle. It was a wonderful, wonderful day until Ray turned up three sheets to the wind demanding his job back as hospital radio station manager. He staggered into the creme brulee stand, toppled over a stack of profiteroles and stumbled into a tray of Manchester tarts. As he lurched forward to grab Kazzy he knocked me flying into a stall laden with fake Faberge eggs and ornamental glass, thankfully the stall stayed erect but I was left in a heap on the ground nursing a twisted ankle and my pride. An irate lady from oncology sent him on his way with a bag of broken biscuits and a face full of strawberry flan. Silly fool.

Happy Monday

Indeed yesterday was a glorious day.

Firstly I managed to wangle dad's hat back as the winner of my Fedora Hat Raffle passed away and the family were only to pleased to give me dad's smelly head wear. They told me the elderly chap died whilst wearing it, daren't tell dad as he'll take it as a bad omen. He was pleased as punch when I presented it to him over tea and tales from Ansty Cowfold.

Secondly rumour has it Tony's sister and Duncan Blackhorn are no longer a (drunken) item. A not so little bird told me she discovered him texting a pub landlady in the Costa Blanca after her karaoke rendition of 'I Speaka Da Lingo' at a pub in Withenshaw. I am pleased I did not take it any further with her as I hear she chased him out of the karaoke bar brandishing a six inch stiletto court shoe.

Thirdly a new volunteer has started at work. She is called Mandy and is eager to help, so much so I was able to take some time out in the filing room whilst she manned a reception full of irate clients this morning.

Talking of clients as predicted Ray showed up at the office today. I usually open reception to a queue of people waiting for housing advice and today was no exception, a large queue snaked down the street with Ray at the front. As soon as he saw me he burst into tears and threw his arms around me. I am in no way a demonstrative person so felt most embarrassed by his open display of affection in front of twenty or so other men. Thankfully Mandy took over and I was able to sit Ray down in an interview room with a hot sweet tea. He was soon seen by a member of the team. Although confidentiality must be adhered to the team later assured me Ray will be okay. Although I'm sure I saw one team member wink as she was saying it. I'm not sure what she meant by that! Or what she was implying! Still I'm pleased to know he is safe.

William Shatner

Kazzy is the new, rather enthusiastic station manager at Portland Hospital Radio. She is like a cross between a boistrous labrador puppy and Sue Pollard. Where Ray once filed his Crosby Stills and Nash long players in alphabetical order, she now has a new fangled MP3 player installed. The whole place has been spring cleaned and an array of ceramic cats are dotted about the place. She came in this evening wearing a baseball hat back to front and a skin tight lurex dress that barely covered her behind. Thankfully she was wearing lurid green leggings underneath.
I'm not sure what my daughter Louise thought, she came into the studio to help me out this evening. I introduced her to Pierre last week over a light supper of crumpets and hot tea and I think she is smitten. It was Pierre's last broadcast at Portland Hospital Radio this evening, he is spending the summer inter-railing and hopes to break into the heady world of broadcast in France. To keep the mood light I played Captain Sensible's 'Happy Talk', Stevie Wonder 'I Just Called to Say I Love You' and managed t dig out a William Shatner (yes James T Kirk!) covering Pulp's 'Common People'. Must have jingled Pierre's strings as he and Louise left the studio together and haven't been seen since! If only music could work such wonders with my love life!