Disintegrating Shopping Bags

Now the weather has turned a shade colder I have been rooting around in search of suitable attire. My red knitted bobble hat complete with pom pom has gone awol as has my much loved, cosy ski jumper. I've had both items for twenty years or more, they may have gone a little saggy and bobbly in the wash but they're comforting and most importantly warm. Unable to locate half of my winter wardrobe my daughter Louise suggested I buy some new winter clothes. I pleaded poverty and was about to head out to the local charity shop (where I had originally purchased my red hat and ski jumper) when Louise scampered about in her room, coming out seconds later with £50 in her hand. 'Buy a decent jumper dad', she said folding the notes into my palm. Thankfully her mobile rang and she darted off to her room, giving me chance to pop the money back in her purse and make it out of the door. I caught the bus into town and strided past the large chain stores, just then I caught sight of my Ex - she of the acid tongue - edging her way out of a well known discount retailer, loaded down with five full paper bags of cheap undergarments and the like. The heavens had opened and a deluge of rain drenched everyone shopping. I didn't want to help as my Ex's new knickers spilled forth from soggy shopping bags so I took refuge in the nearest charity shop, only to be confronted by my red bobble hat and ski jumper. I think someone has been up to some tricks.