Trouble and Strife

'Larger than life' is how many people describe my friend Ray, however I feel the phrase 'Trouble and Strife' is more fitting. This summer I took two weeks off work to join Ray on an all expenses paid luxury camping trip, it would have been better spent making paper airplanes from five pound notes and launching them out of the window. I'd be better off financially. I took three trains and two taxis to a remote campsite somewhere in Wales, after wrangling with an argumentative chap on reception I was finally admitted to the site. Trudging through the mud in the dark I located the caravan, a rust bucket from the 60's. I was horrified but Ray didn't seem to phased. He let me in and thrust a bundle of musty covers into my arms, suggesting I 'Get some kip before the cockerel starts up'. Left in the tiny lounge area I made my bed on a damp sofa and hoped I would wake somewhere else.