No Short

I am in France folks! That's right, Dr Moonlove takes on the continent. It's my first trip abroad and it has been a rather enlightening week. My daughter booked a couple of cheap flights and a campsite stay on a whim after a little lottery win. She has brought along me and her ne'er to do well boyfriend, who has already been hauled up in a giant French supermarche for trying to pilfer a baguette. The fool. How he thought he could disguise a two foot long loaf of bread in his hoodie is anyone's guess but he tried and clearly thought les femmes francaises would simply think he was pleased to see them. Well one rather wiry but tough looking security guard clearly wasn't impressed and evicted him pronto, leaving me and my daughter to saunter the aisles on the hunt for two pairs of budgie smugglers. The French lifeguards have deemed our knee length surf style shorts unsuitable for the campsite pool, so we must wear the skimpiest of speedos. No speedos, no entry. Or 'No Short' as the sign says on the door to the pool. I'll let you know how I get on!